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Fandom: Psych
Author: MusicalLuna
Rating: T
Characters/Pairings: Shawn/Juliet
Genre: Humor
Warnings: None
Complete: Yes
Summary: Shawn is an idiot. Thankfully, Juliet is not.
A/N: Prompt: Knife Wheeeeeee weird prompt. <3 Shules Ficathon '08 entry.
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em.
“This is not exactly how I saw this going...in my head...” Shawn whispered over his shoulder at Juliet. She glowered at him.
“Really, Shawn?” she hissed back, “You drag me off to a seedy bar on the bad side of town to investigate a case in which more than one gang member is involved and you're surprised by this turn of events?”
“Hey, gang members can be perfectly cool people, Jules, that's no reason to—”
“Are you done yakking already?” Cale asked, crowding them back against the bar. Shawn flashed a smile at the dark-haired gang member.
“Yep, sorry, just a quick aside. What do you need me to do to prove you can trust me?” He leaned forward a little, wiggling his fingers near his ear. “Wanna tell me a secret?”
Cale scowled at him and said snidely, “No, I have something else in mind.”
A bulky guy to his left reached into his waistband and Juliet stiffened, her hand clenching around Shawn's wrist. The man produced a blade, handing it deliberately to Cale, passing it right in front of Shawn's face.
A feral sort of grin curled Cale's mouth. “We're going to put you through a little test Shawn.”
“I can do tests,” Shawn said, nodding, “sure, what are we talking about? Math? Science? Literature? Because I've gotta tell you, literature is my weakness.” He just managed not to react to Juliet's fingertips jabbing sharply into his kidneys.
Both he and Juliet jerked back slightly when Cale flipped the knife around, taking it by the blade and holding it out, over Shawn's shoulder. “You, take this,” he told Juliet and she warily accepted the knife. “Bring it down thirty times in under a minute between each finger. If you can do it without either of you flinching, moving away, or backing down, we'll tell you everything. You don't, and, well, we can't risk you going to help the Cranes.”
Shawn blinked at him. “I'm sorry, uh, whose fingers?”
Cale smirked. “Yours.”
With a shrug, Shawn said, “Oh. Okay. Let's do it.”
Juliet's nails dug into Shawn's arm and she smiled blindingly at Cale. “Can we have just two seconds to talk?”
The gangster shrugged. “Sure.”
Shawn started to open his mouth and was cut off by a violent shove, prodding and forcing him through the crowd of gang members down to an empty space at the bar. The knife in Juliet's hand came up, nearly nicking the tip of his nose. “Hey, watch it!” he said, covering the appendage protectively.
“Shawn, have you gone completely and utterly insane?” she demanded.
“Jules. It's okay, I trust you,” he said, unfazed by her anger.
“And while that's very sweet Shawn, we are not doing this. We're getting out of here,” she said and Shawn's eyes widened slightly. He recognized that glint in her eyes.
“But Jules, we—”
The detective whipped around, brandishing the knife at the gang members, raising her voice loud enough to gather the attention of the entire bar. “Back off. You're not testing anyone, understand me? I'm not going to risk cutting him to go through your stupid little trust test.”
Looking startled, and surprised, definitely surprised, Cale and the other gang members backed up slightly, widening the gap between them. Shawn shrugged sheepishly as Juliet grabbed hold of his t-shirt, hauling him along behind her toward the entrance whilst keeping the knife pointed out in front of her.
“Keep back!” she barked sharply. The second they were close enough, she dragged Shawn out the door and into the Santa Barbara sunlight.
“Jules,” Shawn whined as she towed him toward the car, muttering under her breath. “That was going to be a good source!”
“Are you or are you not a psychic?” she shot back at him, yanking open the car door and pushing him into the passenger side seat.
Shawn slouched down in the seat, crossing his arms. “That's so unfair, Jules.”
Glancing up to see Cale watching them from the barroom door, Juliet turned back and said grimly, “Remind me never to let you choose the leads ever again.”
She slammed the door.
